even the water
drowning you
is hard to swallow
now

burning

daybreak
it's eyes drooping with fatigue
squinted, maybe even
stuck together.
it yawns, stretches
and never truly
wakes.

it's terrible from the start.
nonstop action
until, ass to seat
letting yourself blink for more than
a fraction of a second
you're asleep again.

skin crawling.

bones convulsing
under stagnant skin

it is absolute, irreversible
torture.

longer hair than ever
there is now not enough
to curtain a wide-eyed face.

depression is supposed to die off
with the snow
and yet as the days grow warmer
it gets worse.

the voice of reason,
no longer logical
screams everyone is looking
screams, this is not enough
everything is wrong

bellows,
get
out.

598urgfhfre6

the fear of
childhood inadequacy.
the sound of a truck's
back up warning
reminds you of summer.
the teach who is most alike
her students,
a year older,
voice 5 years younger,
the day bounces with happiness.

up down, updown
up.
just listen to a windows culling song
it calls you to its valor
lock your legs together and
dive.

life is unbearable sometimes
and other times, its too short.